When we’re with another person, we must let go of our own thoughts and desires in order to really receive that person. By practicing mindfulness we begin to really pay attention to each other.
We can give an attuned, undefended presence where we’re interested and we care but we don’t have an agenda. We’re not trying to control that person or that person’s perception of us.
Maybe you can choose one person, in one situation, and focus on letting go of the controlling and just be there. You can even say to yourself ‘I have all the time in the world’ because there’s a certain tightening when we don’t have enough time.
Mindful listening encourages an expanded awareness that also allows you to take in the nonverbal aspects of someone’s language. Match your breath to their breath. Look into their eyes when you can— with the intention to see the best nature of their soul.